The news of the 1st of October 2026
Good evening, folks. Let’s talk about the news. Because the news is where they feed you fear, distraction, and horseshit, and you eat it up with a spoon. And I’m here to remind you: it’s all bullshit, and it’s bad for you. So here’s one: a co‑pilot on a FlyDubai flight tries to crash the plane, stabs the captain, and the passengers tie him up with headphone cables. That’s your modern aviation safety system: Sony accessories. And Trump? He blames Iran. Of course he does. If a squirrel falls out of a tree in New Jersey, it’s Iran. Politicians love a scapegoat: keeps you scared, keeps the bombs flowing, keeps the defense contractors hard. And the best part? The passengers saved the day. Folks, if you’re flying in 2026, your life depends on whether the guy in 14B remembered to pack his Beats by Dre. And Tennessee, God bless ’em, tried to kill a woman with lethal injection, twice, and she lived. Only in America do we screw up killing people. We can bomb brown people halfway across the world...